🌿 Revisit #3 — Me Tarzan, Me Distracted:
When Screens Steal the Eyes… and the Intimacy
When Screens Steal the Eyes… and the Intimacy
Distraction is the new infidelity.
Not sexual.
Not romantic.
But emotional —
the kind that slowly replaces presence with pixels,
connection with noise,
marriage with a screen.
Tarzan didn’t mean to choose the device over Jane.
He didn’t even realize he was doing it.
But here’s the truth no one likes to admit:
Intimacy dies the moment your partner becomes second place to a glowing rectangle.
This revisit pulls back the vines on why screens become escape hatches
— and how Jane’s desire to be seen was never “needy”…
just human.
🌸 What Jane Was Really Feeling
She wasn’t jealous of the screen.
She was starving for his eyes — the gateway to every form of intimacy.
She wasn’t angry because he was watching something.
She was hurting because he wasn’t watching her.
Every time he looked down at that screen,
her heart whispered:
“I guess I’m not interesting anymore.”
It’s not the device that wounds.
It’s the displacement.
When attention leaves, desire follows.
🌿 What Tarzan Was Really Feeling
Tarzan didn’t see the problem — not because he didn’t care,
but because screens offered what emotions often don’t:
✔ predictability
✔ release
✔ control
✔ escape from things he didn’t have words for
The screen didn’t judge him.
Didn’t expect anything.
Didn’t need him to “figure things out.”
It just gave him… quiet.
But he didn’t understand the tradeoff:
Every stolen glance at the screen was a stolen piece of intimacy.
And each one silently told Jane,
“You’re not the priority.”
He meant no harm.
But harm happened anyway.
🌿 Where the Communication Clogged
Jane didn’t want to sound jealous of technology.
Tarzan didn’t want to feel controlled.
So she stayed silent.
He stayed distracted.
And intimacy stayed dying.
It’s one of the most common modern marriage wounds —
completely preventable, rarely addressed.
🌿 How It Could Have Gone Differently
What Jane could have said:
“I miss your eyes.
When you look at the screen instead of me,
I feel disconnected.
I want us back.”
What Tarzan could have said:
“I didn’t realize this hurts you.
Let’s create space where we’re fully present.”
What they both needed:
A phone-free hour every night
A no-screens-in-bed rule
Evening rituals of shared presence
A few minutes of intentional eye contact
Replacing background scrolling with background connection
Rebuilding intimacy isn’t technical.
It’s relational.
🌿 Series 3 Intimacy Insight
Attention is the most valuable currency in a relationship.
Where attention goes, intimacy grows.
Where attention leaves, intimacy dies.
🌴 Jungle Laugh:
“Forget King of the Jungle — Tarzan’s just trying to be King of Taking the Trash Out.”
🔗 Navigation:
← Revisit #2 -Me Jane, Me Unnoticed
→ Revist #4 - Me Jane, Me Wondering